Oh! Nevaagain, you knew you by posting you would get some flack and indeed your words are truly sad. Perhaps you felt in need some prodding? You are also old before your time--- 36 is still young!
For the sake of your dignity and own happiness: get a life of your own choosing, not the pathetic straightjacket the org hands out.
You have become institutionalised and that is a tragedy.
Xanthippe's warning is real possibility ... how would you feel in 10 years time because you just went with the JW flow? Think about it.
Even you know there is another life awaiting you...make new friends including with non-JW females and don't pre-judge them with Watchtower assumptions because remember the Watchtower is always wrong. Courage my friend!